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senpai-fetish:

musclesenpai:

dansnotonphil:

blonderamen:

221bismydivision:

if you kill a guy who has a boner does his penis continue to be erect or what

Yes. It does actually. And when they go to the morgue to be prepared for burial, the person cleaning them up and such breaks it so it lays flat.

“So what do you do for a living?
“I put makeup on dead people and snap boners.”

"Die Hard"

Die hard

alleoop:

chisanaai:

dnotive:

oh.

OH.

#SHOTSFIRED

bwwwssssshhhhhhhhh:

manhood:

This could be us

I want to dedicate my blog to Sunday sport articles from now on

vinebox:

me at the movies

bingtoolbarvevo:

excuse me

youcantcancelquidditch:

youcantcancelquidditch:

youcantcancelquidditch:

dorm life

oh my god the response email converts the description to all caps and

om f g the maintenance guy just showed up like “you have a problem with your sink? and also a… fan… returning to the mothership.” and i was like ‘uh’ and then he just grinned and was like ‘yeah, i got the call and the guy on the phone just goes ‘i’ve got to read you this one.

cassbutt:

batreaux:

You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train 

I.. I was expecting cas

cryingzitao:

"why do you listen to kpop when you cant even understand it?"

image

rockyraccoonpictureshow:

we’ll finally become david bowie